Kid Chores

When I was younger, I didn't have very many chores around the house. I had to load/unload the dishwasher and keep my room clean. As I got older, I understood the words layaway. Want extra clothes that weren't part of the necessities, earn money toward your layaway that was at the Closet or Ups and Downs! I would tell my mom to not clean the house so I could and I would get a few extra dollars to get some super dope clothes! Fair trade off if you ask me.

With McKinley, we haven't really issued too many chores. He has helped us around the house when we ask. He loves to help throw clothes in the washer and dryer. He helps dust because his crane truck is part of the equation. Straightening up the playroom when needed can be a little bit of a struggle. And, he sets the table from time to time and brings his plate from the table to the counter. But that's about it. I'm thinking it's time to add a few more items to his list of things to do. Also, he got a VivoFit for his birthday and there is a chore check list app that I think will be more of game than a chore. Fingers crossed.

I've been reading some of the family chore charts on Pinterest, and for his current and previous age level, it seems to be about the same. And it's close to what he we've had him doing in the past so it shouldn't be too much of an issue. Or at least I would like to think it won't be. Easier said than done! Or is it!

Last night was trash round up night. McKinley was a little on the wild side, so I took advantage of all the energy and asked him to go around and grab the trash cans out of the bathrooms and bring them down to the trash. Not a word. Not a fight. He went upstairs, brought the cans down one at a time, and dumped them. YES! One chore added to the list. I also remembered that he loves to water the garden in the summer. Another chore to add. Picking up stray toys from around the house and picking up his playroom will be another story! We don't ask him to make his bed, because currently he sleeps with bed rails. This kid is a crazy sleeper. So crazy in fact that he fell out of the bed just a couple of weeks ago when sleeping over at my parents house. Has never done that before, but I've always worried about it. Bed rails won't be coming down anytime soon! 

So, if you're keeping score, here are the chores so far:

1) Gather up bathroom trash

2) Dust

3) Pick up toys and playroom

4) Help water the garden/plants

5) Unload the dishwasher with appropriate dishes

6) Help sort laundry and add to washer/dryer

This morning, I started playing around with his VivoFit app and found some pre-loaded chores. Love that! So I was able to get some additional ideas and I was able to add them to the list, adjust the frequency in which he does them, and add a coin value for each one. Super cool! Here are some additional chores I added:

7) Do homework

8) Brush teeth in the morning (we do night to ensure they are super clean)

I'm thinking eight is pretty good for now. And, if those goes well, we can always add more. Again, if we make it more of a game, and not really tasks, I'm thinking this could be a success. Not sure there will be a true monetary reward, but maybe a sweet treat here or there to his favorite ice cream shop.

What are you currently doing? How do you reward the work that's done? Is it just expected? I would love to hear your thoughts!

XO,

Andrea

Motherhood

When I thought about becoming a mom, I thought about all those tiny fingers and toes. Those baby coos. That sweet baby smell after a bath. You know, all of the adorable things that come with babies. But I didn't really think much further than that. I didn't think about the learning to crawl, walk, talk, potty train, etc. I only thought about having a baby. Having a baby was the easy part.

McKinley is now seven. Seven years have gone by since he was a baby and boy are things different. Motherhood is different. Motherhood is hard! No one understands that until they are mothers. Before motherhood, I remember listening to other mothers talk about having a baby, raising a baby, a child, and god forbid, a teenager. I would internally roll my eyes, think "It can't be that hard", and walk away saying how different things would be when I became a mother. Shame on me! Since becoming a mom, I want to hug every single mother! I want to tell them I understand. That I get it! And that I need a hug too. 

Everyone talks about the terrible twos. That the independence has started to set in and life with a two year is old is the worst. Guess what, two was fine. Two was great. It was three that had me crazed. Then there was four. Then five. Then six. Six was hard. With six came true independence. A little bit of snark. Influence from other kids that was being tested at home. A test that he often failed. With six came more discipline. More arguments. More frustration at being a bad mother. Well, we are one week into being seven and I've never witnessed anything like this. Tears on the daily, from him not me. Anger like I've never seen over having to do homework or not being able to play 24/7. And a mom who is completely doubting her mothering skills. Have I hovered too much? Have I been too hard on him? Should I have let him figure out the math problems alone instead of intervening? Where in motherhood had I gone wrong?

Yesterday was rough. And the evening that followed even more so. He told me that I was getting in the way. Ruining everything because he needed to work on activities for school instead of spending time playing with Dada. That all he wanted to do was get the work done so he could play. But the thing is, he wasn't getting the work done correctly. And when I asked him to spend more time on the work to correct it, all hell broke lose. Those ugly words vomited out of his mouth, leaving me numb and with eyes full of tears. I'm not sure if he meant them or not, and he probably did, and I am now drowning in them. Maybe I am ruining everything. Maybe I am getting in the way. Maybe I am doing it all wrong. I did ask him later that evening what he meant and he said it was his way of telling me he didn't want to be around me right then. My response, maybe you should say just that instead.....

Motherhood. Motherhood is glorious when it's going really well. Motherhood is draining when you are up all night with sick child and all they want is for you to lay with them. Motherhood is tricky when you're sliding on that slippery slope of stepping in and helping or sitting back and letting them fail. Motherhood is ugly when you're crying those tears of sadness after your child has said things to you that you know you will never forget. Motherhood is a badge that every mother should wear with pride because the shit we put up with on a minute, hourly, daily basis is worse than any of those bad jobs we work(ed)! Motherhood is a sorority of women all over the world that are truly just trying to keep their heads above water, get more than five hours of sleep a night, and getting tipsy on wine when they finally get a night free to hang out with other moms. Motherhood is not for the faint of heart.

Over the past year, I've called my mom more to apologize for anything I might have done during my childhood. There will never be enough apologies. I've also called my mom to vent, cry, and vent some more. I've gone to her house and had champagne in the middle of the day because I deserve it. I've often wondered how many tears she actually shed during her time raising me. Tears of pride. Tears of shame. Tears of unhappiness. I've never actually asked. So again mom, I apologize. And if you're reading this, maybe you should pick up the phone and call your mom to apologize. Or invite her over coffee. Or invite yourself over for champagne. Because now she's no longer just your mom. She's a member of that Motherhood sorority. A sister for life. A friend for life. Your mom for life. And if your mom is no longer with you, well then, call that sweet sorority sister of yours because she's going to be there for you too!

Will McKinley and I be friends at the end of all of this? I sure hope so. What I do know, is that he'll hate me. Call me names behind my back. But, he'll also love me when he wants to. Need me when things get tough. And be my friend when it's time. Because if motherhood is done correctly, I'm definitely going to be his least favorite person for a long time. And maybe that time is now.

XO,

Andrea

He'll Love to Read, Eventually

With a show of hands, how many of you remember learning to read? If you didn't raise your hand, that's okay. I didn't either! I honestly don't remember learning to read which includes the techniques. I remember my dad reading to me nightly as a child, even after I could read, but that's about it. So when it comes to helping McKinley learn to read, I'm relying on old news and techniques that I think might work. And the early homework arguments have begun....

We've been reading to McKinley since birth. In the wee early hours of morning, after his bottle, I would bounce him to sleep while reading small books. I would read on car trips to VA, even if he was only three months old, hoping that the words would sooth him and soak in via osmosis. Plane rides brought new books to entertain him for the first five minutes. We took the book The Little Red Caboose with us every where we went. And, we would find him reading to himself from toy catalogs from time to time. Still today, at age six, we share the nightly reading of books he picks out. And I'm looking forward to the day he can read a book to us and we read one to him. I don't want to give up reading to him.

 

I created a library in his room. We have so many books, which isn't a bad thing, that I didn't have a place to house them all. So, I turned his changing table, something we still need for storage, and turned it into a mini library. It still houses underwear and socks in the drawers. And in the larger baskets on the bottom are pajamas, small blankets, and bath towels. But the shelves hold most of the books that we read often. I also have a large basket in our den that's full as well. Again, trying to instill that reading is fun! That he will love to read...eventually! And I love this little bookcase. It's full of Little Golden Books, books we've purchased at his school book fairs, and others that Santa has given him over the years. See, even Santa thinks it's important to learn to read. My hope is that one day he will simply pick books off of these shelves, sit in his bed, and enjoy reading to himself from time to time. Fingers crossed!

But the reading is a slow process. And when I say slow, it's not because he can't, it's because he doesn't want to. He read weekly to his class over the past 20 weeks, and I know it's 20 because he had to fill out the 20 books he read, and we practiced daily. When he's interested, meaning his idea, he's totally into it. When it cuts into McKinley time, which means play time, he has zero interest. He works at sounding words he doesn't know and excels at the site words he does. And he's even making the effort to spell three letter words. It's just getting over the hurdle of doing it consistently and with gusto. I know we will get there, but it's the most frustrating thing for a parent when you have a strong willed child!

At the same time, he's very much into writing his own books. At first it started with pictures and he would "read" the book to us based on the pictures he drew. Most recently, it was a Ghost Ship book, you can view the reading here, and it's evolved into books with pictures and a few words. Words that he have to spell for him. I try my hardest to sound out the letters in hopes he will start writing the word himself, but it usually turns out that I'm angered by his lack of trying and just spell it for him. Or leave the room in a complete huff. Strong willed parents should not be allowed to raise strong willed children. It's not good for the chemically colored hair that turns grayer with every argument. I guess it's good for my hair stylist....

On the last day of school this year, McKinley announced that he wanted to go to the library. I knew why. He recently discovered Titanic and wanted to check out a few books on the subject. I used this opportunity to get him ready for the Summer Reading Program. I even told him it was time for him to get his own library card in hopes it would excite him to start the reading journey. And, that when he finally got a wallet (something he's dying to get), he could add the card to it. We, I, picked out books that I thought would interest him, while he spent time at a small table scouring through his Titanic book. I even picked out three beginning reader books for us to work on. So far, he's read the Titanic books three times each and a couple of the other train books I found. I figure it's only the third day of summer vacation so I shouldn't push too hard. But come June, I'm changing my tune. We are going to tackle this thing called reading, and we're going to come through it with flying colors. Or more chemical color to my every growing gray hair. At least something will have color....

What are you doing to help your child read? Do they have interest or do they just want to be left alone? Do they read fluently? And if so, what did you do to assist? I know he will learn to read. Just like he learned to talk, walk, and everything else I thought he would never learn to do. The impatience in me just needs to learn to backseat. Or just leave the room in a huff....

XO,

Andrea

An Overactive Child

I've said before that for me and McKinley, our active days are our most successful days. And when I say that I mean on the days that we are out of the house, doing fun things around the city, and being active, they keep us from arguing, him getting bored, which why we tend to argue in the first place. With summer coming, my husband fears that we will argue more and be in a sour place by the time he comes home. And on some days, that might happen. But I don't suspect it will happen every day!

As you know from reading the blog, we are all over the city on fun adventures. We hit the zoo, Deanna Rose, World's of Fun, Union Station/Crown Center, and on rainy days the mall or aquarium. We haven't done as many things lately, school has been in full gear since post Spring Break, and the poor kid has had a bout with the flu and a horrible virus that landed us in the ER last week. But, all that's about to change on May 19th. The last day of school is fastly approaching and I'm thinking ahead about all the fun things we're going to do to celebrate summer!

However, I'm also worried about him being the over active child. You know the one. They have soccer, baseball, swimming, and piano. They have practice or games almost daily, leaving very little time to be a kid. I don't want that for McKinley. As of now, he's involved in baseball. Practice is every Friday, with games every Sunday, and it will be over in early June. He's also involved in a weekly combo dance class, but we've missed a month of class, so I'm not sure it's worth going back. Up next will be swimming lessons. Two weeks of daily dips in the pool that will bring tears and hopeful joy. And there's the possibility of another dance class, but that's up the air as of now. Oh, and there's a possible basketball camp. He's very interested in basketball and I would love for him to get involved. So now we're up to three activities and that doesn't include the fun stuff I have planned. And we haven't even included vacations? When is it too much? When is he going to just be McKinley?

At this point, something has to give, in my opinion. Swimming is a non-negotiable, so that's stays on the summer agenda. Like I said, baseball is over in early June, so that's not an issue. What I guess we need to decide is if he wants to continue dancing or if he would like to take the summer off and try a different sport. I definitely don't want him overextended. I want him to be a kid, enjoy his summer break, and play from time to time. I mean, he's six. His summers will be completely full of other responsibilities before we know it. 

What do you do to combat the over active child or is yours one of them? How much is too much? When do kids just get to be kids? This past Kindergarten year has been eye opening in the fact that our expectations of children is incredible. I wasn't expecting it!! And I'm not talking about my expectations. I'm talking about the educational system. I personally need a break and I know McKinley does! It's time to turn off our brains and just be!  

I would love to hear your thoughts so let's chat!!

XO,

Andrea

Trophies and Ribbons

I am not a mom who believes that everyone should get a trophy. Not everyone deserves a trophy or a ribbon. Do you know how you earn a trophy or a ribbon? You work hard and win. That's how you earn a trophy. There is only one World Series Champion, only one NCAA Men's Basketball Champion, only one Super Bowl Champion. See a pattern here?  So why do we insist that children get a trophy just for participating? We are giving our children a false impression that there is no need to work hard because you get a trophy no matter what. We are setting our children up for instant failure!  

The first year McKinley "earned" a trophy was in 2015 and I was still a little leery of giving it to him. They didn't even get it from their coach. Their last game was rained out, and as a result, the parents had to go and pick them up. Not really a way to receive it, right? So Joel brings it home, McKinley takes one look at it and says, "I thought it would be bigger." A little ungrateful and yet another reason kids don't need a participant trophy. They don't even respect it. In 2016, we missed the last game, for a reason I can't even remember, and we never received McKinley's trophy and he never even asked about it. Best thing that ever happened! 

We haven't really had to worry about the trophy/ribbon issue since last summer, that is until McKinley decided he wanted to sign up for the district tournament stacking challenge last Thursday. They learned about stacking in PE this month, and when the flyer came home, McKinley told me he really wanted to participate. He thought it was fun and wanted to try. How could I say no? I'm not going to tell my child he can't do something, even if he had just learned how. I want him to know he can do anything. But at the same time, I was so nervous for him because he wasn't skilled at stacking. And we didn't have cups. And I didn't even know you could buy cups! Lots to learn about stacking.

So when Thursday rolled around, McKinley started to grow nervous. He even went so far as to tell me he didn't want to go because he was so worried about all the people that would be looking at him. I told him that there was no reason to be worried and that no one was really going to be watching because they would be so busy watching their own children. Still, the nerves were evident that night as he clung to me and never let me leave his side. He practiced and I was shocked at watching him do his thing. He wasn't super fast, but he was patient and in the zone as he stacked and un-stacked his cups. So awesome to watch your kid work at something they have set their minds to, right?

Then it was time to compete. He didn't know about the stop watch aspect, and some really sweet older boys showed him how it worked. He only needed to be shown once. He had this! And then it was his turn. Three tries to get your best time and boy did he concentrate! And they weren't great times, but that's not what mattered. He had fun, he worked hard, and he accomplished his goal of competing. And that's how you earn a trophy or ribbon. 

 

During the ribbon ceremony, they had all six and under contestants come up on stage. There were 15 participants and only 12 ribbons. Each child did earn a participant ribbon, but only 12 children received ribbons for their best times. McKinley was not one of them. As he came off stage to join us, there were tears. They didn't roll down his face, and he didn't cry in front of the crowd, but I saw those crocodile size tears and I knew. I knew that he was sad because he didn't get a ribbon and he asked why. And I simply said, because their times were better than yours. And that's the truth. I'm not going to lie to him. I told him that he if wanted a ribbon like theirs, he needed to practice and then came back next year and earn one! And that's all he needed. The tears were gone.

Later that night as I tucked him in, he asked me if his ribbon meant anything. I told him that it did. It meant that he tried. That he had the courage to sign up, being the only student from his Kindergarten class, and do something he had never done before. That he had enough confidence in himself to compete among others that have been stacking for awhile. And that most importantly, he had fun. Because if you can't have fun, why do it?

So we are planning to purchase cups so he can continue to practice. Who knows if this will be a real thing for him in the future, but he is going to know that we fully support him in anything he wants to do. And, that we are going to help him become the best he can be, because he's going to earn that trophy or ribbon with hard work and practice. Always practice!

XO,
Andrea

Bullies

Bullies. To sum them up, they suck! And you encounter them at every age and stage of life. I honestly don't remember truly being bullied in school, but I do remember that a boy in fifth grade told me he would "go out with me, but I wasn't pretty enough". To be honest, the "pretty enough" words have followed me all my life. Maybe that's a result of being bullied about my looks. I wasn't one of the cute girls in school. I definitely went through my awkward phase just like everyone else. Although, there were those girls that never did and I envied them. Still do!

So when my six year told me on the way to school today that he didn't like going to school because of the bullies, my heart broke. He's in Kindergarten, just starting his school career, and I'm already dealing with not liking school for reasons that are out of my control! And I hate that someone so innocent and sweet is dealing with something so hateful. Bullies! They suck!

I remember it truly started around the age of three when a little boy joined his preschool class late in the year. McKinley had a toy that the child wanted, and instead of asking (I know, who does that at three), he just took it out of McKinley's hand. Well, McKinley pushed him and took it back. Was he being a bully, I asked myself? My dad said no! He was telling the kid that he wasn't going to take his bulling ways and took matters into his own three year old hands! 

With Kindergarten comes new discoveries. McKinley found the friends that are more like him and I'm so thankful for that! I love listening to him talk about the boys who have similar interests and what they do during recess and centers during the school day. However, there are days when he tells me that "today wasn't a good day" because one child was bad all day and upset the class. Or upset him specifically. And for a while, it was daily. I've witnessed the bullish behavior in class myself and it's upsetting. And the fact that's it affecting my child's experience in school is even worse. 

Bullies. In my opinion, these are the ones who are sad inside. Are troubled about something. Are angry. And they don't really know how to deal with these emotions, so they take them out on other people. Treat them poorly and try to bring them down to their level. I said all of this to my child and told him that sometimes there just isn't anything we can do to help them. They are who they are and sometimes never change. 

So today, when he told me that he didn't like school because of the bullies, I told him that unfortunately, there are bullies throughout your life and everyone needs to choose how to deal with them. For me, I will continue to be kind and nice to them. You know the age old statement, "Kill them with kindness". I will not fall prey to their attitude and let it change mine. I told McKinley to continue to hold his chin up high and to be the kind, awesome kid he is. To be the good guy. That's all anyone can do. And then he asked, "What if they tell me I'm not a good guy?" Again, heartbreak. I just reinforced that the fact that he is a good guy and to simply ignore the ones that say he isn't. Because let's be honest, the bullies are simply not the good guys! Again, they suck.

Is your child currently dealing with bullies? Have they been impacted by the attitude and nastiness that comes with bullies? How are you talking to your children about them? What advice can you share? I'm all about the kindness rule of thumb. That, and continually reinforcing to my child that he's awesome! And that nothing, or no one, will change that!

XO,

Andrea

Raising a Child in 2017

Just this morning I was reading a blog post on Scary Mommy about the 26 phrases I should use on my child when they are in the middle of a temper tantrum. And they said it would work on teens as well. So I decided to take the plunge and open the article, knowing full well I would shake my head at half the phrases listed. I wasn't incorrect! And not an hour later, I was disciplining my child without an utter of one of the 26 phrases listed!

Here's an example: 

1) Instead of saying “You’re being so difficult!” I should try this: “This is a tough one, huh? We’re going to figure this out together.” Um, no. He's being difficult and I'm going to tell him that! And, I'm going to ask him what he can do to change it. Just like I did this morning. He was complaining about how cold he was, so I suggested we get dressed for school, I had laid out a sweatshirt, and it would help warm him up. He's come back, "No, it will cut into my playing time." So mutter to myself, "Fine, be cold. No skin off my nose." And as I walk away, I get the ever constant "Fine...." which sounds like this "Fffiiiinnnneee". A drawn out f, followed by a long i that lasts a while, and then a sharp n on the end. Something we hear all the time. And on that "fine", I had had enough. It was time for a come to Jesus about being kind, showing gratitude, and addressing that shitty attitude!

Now, I'm not one that's opposed to spanking. And when I say spanking, I mean a swift pop on the bottom. Nothing more, and that's exactly what I did. I don't do it often, because it's not needed, but I do use it when I need to get his attention. Today was the day. It all started when he woke up. He asked me if he had to go to school today, something he asks daily, and after being informed yes, proceeded to complain about having to go and not going at all. Instead of feeding into it, I simply walked away. Less than a minute later, he was out of bed and downstairs asking to play. I told him he had 20 minutes and then it was breakfast. And that's when the cold statement was uttered and the getting dressed defiance started. 

I should also back up to the night before. It was his sixth birthday yesterday and we celebrated with my parents for a small family party. Pizza, a train cake, and gifts were on tap and it was a chill event. Until exhaustion set in. Post party, he was a irritable and taking it out on his toys and us. Trying to be patient, without uttering ridiculous phrases like the one above, I told him it was time to start winding down, getting his pajamas on, and thinking about books to read before bed. He was complaint, but still cranky. It wasn't until we were brushing his teeth that it all started. I won't go into detail, but I will tell you that while I was tucking him in, I told him that if I didn't see an improvement in attitude, the toys from his birthday would be put away for a while. He fell asleep while I was in mid sentence. So to wake up as cranky as when he went to bed was not a fun way to start the day. 

 Another example:

2) “That’s it, you’re getting a time-out!” But instead of sending him to timeout, I should say this, “Let’s go to our calm-down space together.” Well, I wasn't the one the needed to calm down, and I'm pretty sure that when I was six, I went to timeout alone! And, I got more than a swift pop on the bottom. My mom was not one to shy away from spanking, and I mean spanking. So when it's time for timeout, guess who goes there alone! And usually in tears. And usually complaining about how mean I am. That's right! I'm mean! And I'm not your friend. And, I'm pretty sure that the more you complain, the longer your going to sit! I won't raise an asshole who things he's entitled to do whatever it is he wants to do without any consequences and to not do it alone!

Another one:

Instead of “Go to your room!” and I should use: “I’m going to stay right here by you until you’re ready for a hug.” Guess who doesn't want a hug? Either of us! And guess what, we both need time apart, so guess who's going to their room? And sometimes, it's me! I walk away and go to my room just to get a minute alone. And sometimes, it's okay for him to go to his room, just to get away. It's not a bad thing to have some separation. And then come back together for a hug. I'm all about hugging it out to ensure he knows that I still love him, even when I'm mad, frustrated, or don't like him. It's important for him to know that I love him no matter what, but I don't need to hug him the minute he gets mad! 

In my opinion, the way we are asking parents to raise and discipline our children is so frustrating! We aren't supposed to raise our voices, spank, show disappointment, show frustration, and constantly use a syrupy voice to tell them it's all going to be okay. It's not always going to be okay! It's not always going to fair! Life isn't fair. And if we don't teach them that now, when do we? When they're 10, 16, 21? So many things aren't going to go their way, like playing before school because you have to get dressed, eat breakfast, and actually go to school! And if you're going to yell, cry, and smash your toys in protest, then it's my job to step in and have that come to Jesus. Complete with a swift pop on the bottom! 

And guess what? He's fine. This is him right before heading out to school. He sang in the car, held my hand as we walked into school, kissed and hugged me goodbye, and told me he loved me as I was leaving. No anger. No frustration. No resentment. Just a child who was disciplined for his actions. Was told to be accountable for his actions. And wasn't an asshole! My mission was accomplished! At least for this morning!

XO,

Andrea

P.S. Here is another one for you to chew on. 

Instead of “Eat your food or you will go to bed hungry!” Try this: “What can we do to make this food yummy?” Really!! I don't serve disgusting food so there really should be a reason to try to make it yummier! You get what you get and you don't throw a fit! Jeesh! 

Raising a Well Rounded Kid

I just told my husband last night that this parenting thing is hard! I don't know if I'm doing it right half of the time and he said, "I'm know I'm not doing it right." So how do you know? I guess you have to wait until their adults, or teens, to know if it's really working. In between all the discipline, the playing, and the adventures, there's also the raising them to be well rounded. 

I'm an old school parent when it comes to activities. Find one or two that work and stick to them. You don't need five activities outside of school. If that were the case, I'm not sure a child would be any good at any of them. There would be no time to give each one the attention and discipline they need. But, how to you find the one or two they're actually good at? I'm also very picky about the activities he can participate in. I like the classic sports like baseball, basketball, golf, and tennis. Football is out of the question and neither my husband or I like soccer. So, the four listed above will be our test sports for now.

When McKinley turned one, he started swimming lessons. Swimming, in my opinion, is a life skill and a sport. There is always going to be some form of water around you and you HAVE to know how to swim. He's not always in love with swimming, but I keep telling him it's non-negotiable. He's not afraid of water, he just doesn't love putting that sweet face in the water. After witnessing Great Britain swimmer Adam Peaty break his own world record during the Rio Olympics, a gold medalist who was once afraid of the water, I'm even more convinced that McKinley will be a swimming master! I would personally love to raise a swim team athlete. Being a swimmer myself, a lifeguard who loves the water but never competed, I always feel at peace near water. I'm hoping the same will eventually ring true for my own child. Summer Olympics 2028, here we come!

Last summer McKinley was part of a Blast Ball team, one step below T-Ball, and played on his first T-Ball team this summer. He likes it, but I think he enjoys fielding (running after every ball in play) more than anything else. But, he's focused. He's always in his "ready position", as Joel calls it, when playing outfield and really thinks through the motions of stepping and throwing the ball to first base. Batting is a struggle from time to time, but we are working with a heavier aluminum bat and those little muscles are working as hard as they can. It frustrates him, but he doesn't give up. I've always said he have a hard worker on our hands and it shows in instances like this. Hard work pays off, right? Keep up the good work, bud! 

And then there's dancing. Our child loves to dance. He calls it "wild dancing" when have a dance party in the living room and he goes full out to the music. He requests "Cake by the Ocean", "Can't Stop the Feeling", "Satisfaction", and we provide 80s hits here and there. He tests out new moves, spins, falls to the floor, and simply enjoys moving. And because of that, I signed him up for Creative Movement at school last year. The teacher is a instructor at a local dance school, Miller Marley, and came to Brookridge Day School once a week to teach ballet, tap, and creative movement. And he liked it. So much so that he asked if he could continue to take dance. So this summer, in addition to T-Ball, he took Kindergarten Combo. It's a 45 minute class that consists of tap and ballet. He is one of two boys in a class of five and he likes it. And he's good at it. His teacher, Miss Missy, encouraged him all summer when he struggled with steps. Constantly re-iterated to him he was a good dancer and to not give up. And as a result, McKinley has decided he would like to continue taking class, so we've signed him for the fall. Am I worried? A little. At five, it's not much of an issue with friends. But when he's 12, and if he's still taking, it could be a teasing issue. A bridge I'm willing to help him cross if he's following his heart and passion. Like any "sporting" athlete, dance is a sport. And again, as a dancer myself, I've defended this unsupported theory for years. And if you don't believe me, google male dancers and look at their physique. Not a sport.....
 

Between swimming and dance, it sounds like I'm asking my child to follow in my own footsteps. And that's simply not the case. Again, swimming is life skill, and he doesn't have to become a lifeguard to fulfill his swimming grade card. He just has to learn to swim. As for dancing, it can only help with his athletics later on. Think about the NFL players who have taken a ballet class to help with coordination and flexibility. It only strengthens his abilities. Again, I've asked him if he wants to dance. I didn't sign him up without his consent. And when he's had enough, I'll be okay with that. But, he will have to have something team oriented in his life. I truly feel every child should be a part of a team environment. It teaches accountability, something I think a lot of kids these days don't have enough of, but that's a different post for a different time.

Come winter, I'm thinking of signing McKinley up for basketball, another sport he's expressed interest in. He plays "hoops" with Joel in my parents basement, on a plastic goal he got for Christmas several years ago, and makes baskets most of the time. Joel is going to chat with our neighbor, who has an adjustable goal in her driveway, to see if we can use hers for early practice. Based on that, we will determine if we pursue the basketball camp. After that, the skies the limit for this dude. Tennis camp, golf lessons, and swimming are on the docket for summer. And of course T-Ball. A well rounded kid can do it all, right?

What activities do you have planned for your kiddos? Do you have aspirations of glory or just to have some follow through? How much is too much in your opinion? Is there ever too much? I realize that McKinley is only five and there's so many other things he could be interested in or able to excel at, and I'm ready to help him pursue those dreams and goals. But he has to learn to swim. Life skill, my friend, life skill!

XO,
Andrea